Topher, the unnamed child, and I were all out to dinner the other night discussing the pups.
A story came up, that I think I tried to block-out, about how Gracie bolted out the front door and played a “fun game” of chase with a crazy woman (me), a minister, two construction workers, and a school bus full of gawking children (and one mortified one).
Back when I worked outside the home, mornings were fairly chaotic for us. One morning, as I was halfway ready (as in I had on my nice blouse, my makeup was on, and I was finishing up my hair). I still had on my pajama bottoms though.
The unnamed child was in 2nd grade, the bus pulled up, and she yelled that she was leaving. I saw her out and was walking to the bedroom to finish getting ready and I heard the door open again and the kid saying she forgot her coat — and then she screamed that Gracie ran out the door!
I ran out the door after her, and the pup, playing some twisted game, ran underneath the school bus!
So here I am, half in my pajamas, half dressed, trying to crawl under a school bus to get my dog — since she WAS NOT coming out.
The kiddo was beyond embarrassed, since all of the kids were staring at me out the bus windows. I went from talking baby talk to the dog, to yelling at her, to begging. As I am half under the bus, the bus driver blasted the horn to scare the dog out — which it did, but it scared me too, and I nailed my head on the bottom of the bus.
Gracie flies down the street, and I am chasing her into the church playground next door. The minister of the church saw us running around and came out to help me get her.
My feet are frozen blocks of ice at this point … since I had no shoes on.
I would almost get to her, and then she would turn and see me and run faster.
Such a fun game for her!
This went on for 20 minutes. She took off over and over, and then flew into the street just as a truck was approaching!
If anyone knows me at all, they how much I love my dogs, and they would know that I would throw myself in front of an oncoming car for them. That my friends, is exactly what I did.
The construction truck slammed on its brakes as the crazy blond in her cloud pajamas pants, nice blouse, and her pearls jumped in front of them to save her dog.
Nice … as they were they got out to help me chase her.
Away she went again, running through all of the neighbors’ yards. I’m sure my neighbors wondered what was happening as they looked out their windows to see a little white poodle, being chased by a half dressed woman, who was being chased by a minister, who was being chased by two construction workers, who (by the way) didn’t speak a lick of English, so I’m not sure they knew completely what was happening.
I literally thought I was going to freeze to death at this point. Mind you, during this fiasco I am soo late to work.
Finally Gracie was slowing down in one of the neighbor’s yards. She had to potty, so right as she squatted down I reached out to grab her … unfortunately it was mid stream, and it went all down the front of me.
I thanked the padre and my construction worker crew, and they laughed saying something in Spanish that I didn’t understand.
As I limped across another neighbor’s yard to get back home can you guess what happened?
Yep, their sprinkler system shot on, drenching me and the dog.
Once I got back inside the house, I was over 45 minutes late already. I went into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. In the last few minutes, I looked like I had entered a wet t-shirt contest (since you could clearly see right through my blouse)I’m guessing that’s what the construction workers were amused about. My hair was plastered down to my head, my mascara was down to my chin, and my red lipstick was smeared across my face. In other words I looked like Courtney Love.
I looked like an insane person off of a horror movie.
So I called in to work, jumped in the shower, and started all over again.
Needless to say after hours of me ranting about this fiasco and me threatening the family within an inch of their lives, Gracie never was able to escape again.
Speaking of starting over again, I got this coffee table for free off of Craigslist.
It was in rough shape, badly scratched and dirty.
I cleaned it up, and I used wood filler to fill in some of the scratches. Once I sanded the everything down I got to work.
I wanted to try my hand at a harlequin pattern. I painted the whole piece ivory. Once the paint had dried I started taping the piece off.
I had to do the taping in two different steps. I did one set of diamonds one day, waited for the paint to dry, peeled it off, and then did the other set of diamonds.
I then distressed the whole piece and finished it off with dark and clear wax to give it an aged look.
Emma Walton says
I really like how you did the coffee table. The taping had to be a bit tricky.
Thanks Emma! It did take a bit of time and a bit of math which is not my strong suit! Have a great week!
So funny!!!! I have 8 dogs and have also spent many mornings running under bushes, through my neighbors’ yards, and yes, even jumped in front of a speeding pickup in my pajamas, to save one of my beloved 4 legged friends. I can so relate to this story. Love the coffee table.
Wow! 8 pups! My hubby has let me know that his has drawn the line with three. I volunteer at my local humane society and if he didn’t set a limit for me I would be bringing a new one home each week. If I ever win the lottery I am opening my own animal shelter.
You made my morning!! I laughed so hard at your dog story!! I have been there with my two dogs before so I know how it feels. Love the coffee table!! It is beautiful!!
Thank you Crystal! My life would be so boring without the insane things my pups put me through!
The story was hilarious and the table is gorgeous!!!
Thank you Sharon! My life is always crazy! Have a great week!
just lovely!!! Love, love, love it!!!
I am amazed unnamed child was in second grade and u had Gracie. I was thinking she was older when u got the pups. My how time flys.
I know, can you believe it? She is going to be a junior next year! Hope you guys are doing well Joy!
Clydia @ Three Mango Seeds says
Oh my goodness — thanks for the chuckle! LOL Love how the table turned out! Plus, I’m a sucker for anything harlequin. We loved plaster paint so much that we sell it and use it on all of our projects!
Thanks Clydia! I do love the paint! I am going to be selling my furniture pieces in a new store here in Wichita that sells it!
Laura @ Inspiration for Moms says
Great story, Shanna! and I really love your table!
Thanks my friend! Have a great week!
Amy @ StowandTellU says
Hysterical!! and your table is AMAZING.
Thank you Amy! Have a great week my friend!
Annette Deardurff says
Love love LOVE this table! Awesome job!
Thank you Annette! Have a great week!
Marie @ The Interior Frugalista says
Oh my goodness, thanks for the chuckle this morning. I had a visual as I was reading your funny story – hilarious! Love your coffee table makeover.
Thank you Marie! With three dogs, a cat and a temperamental teenager my life is always insane. Have a great week!
I was belly laughing at your story. It sounds exactly like a scene in the movies, that you never believe because it’s just too ridiculous.
Mom of 3 dogs and 5 cats, Geeze, I know what you face!
Yesterday my oldest dog (14) Morgan came wandering back from the barn with something big in her mouth. Tripping her. It was a deer leg. Guess who ran like the grayhound she’s not when I tried to get it away from her. You’d have thought the devil was after her!
Table is nice, too. I like how you taped it off. I’ve not done it that way, but it looks easier than the piece-specific stencil I make and use.
That’s hilarious Christine! I would have totally freaked out at the deer leg!
Sharon @ Elizabeth & Co. says
You and Gracie had quite the adventure! And your table turned out beautifully!
Thanks so much Sharon!
I’m visiting from Cozy Little House and stopped in to say that you did a wonderful job on your table! And I truly enjoyed your dog chase story, complete with a very good description of your Courtney Love look. Too funny!
Thanks so much Vickie! What us crazy dog people won’t do for our babies!
What a fantastic story. By the time you got to the part where your pup peeped on you I was giggling and by the time you got to the part about the sprinklers coming on I was laughing hard enough that my family asked what I was reading.
Having three pups of my own I have had more than one early morning, in my pj’s with the neighbors and gardeners watching chase but thankfully I have never had the sprinklers get me.
I am crazy about your table too. Love the colors you used.
Thanks Traci! What we don’t do for our fur babies! Have a great week!
The things we go through for our kids and pets! =) Your table is just gorgeous, love the colors!
Annette Deardurff says
Oh what funny pictures are conjured up reading your hilarious story!!!!!!!!! Love the table!!!
Thanks Annette! Our household is always chaotic!
OH. MY. GOSH! Thank u for your unbelievable humor! Courtney Love. Exactly what I envisioned from your description! I too have chased our dog sans normal clothing with a kid in a stroller. Fun times. That why the redo turned out so amazing. U were getting your ZEN on! Great job. Awesome pix!! 😉
Thanks Melanie! My pups definitely keep life interesting! I wouldn’t trade them for anything though!